An Introduction: Life After Loss

With the end of Gavin and Stacey, I thought now would be a perfect time to introduce myself and make a blog about a cause that is extremely close to my heart.

Before I go into why Gavin and Stacey has had a big impact on my life, let me tell you a little bit about myself and my life.

My name is Rhiannon Eaves, and I am 24 years old. I come from a loving, tight-knit family—my mum, dad, and my younger sister Emilia. Life was perfect, until it wasn’t.

In September 2021, I lost my mum – the most devastating loss I have ever faced. At just 20 years old, I found myself navigating the grief of losing my best friend and my person.  Dealing with the grief of losing her is something I never thought I would have to do and nothing will ever prepare you for watching your own mother take her last breath, but in that moment, I promised her that I’d live my life in a way that would make her proud.

Mum was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in November 2020 and died 10 months later. Pancreatic cancer is notoriously hard to detect early because the tumours don’t show up on scans. Mum’s tumour was discovered by accident when it started pressing on her gallbladder.

Whilst all the scans and tests were going on, I was in my second year of university at Exeter, oblivious to the heartbreak I was about to experience. I received a message from my dad one day telling me he had a business meeting in Devon and was coming to see me. I should’ve known something was wrong—nobody was traveling during Covid. My dad took me on a walk and sat me down and broke the worst news a child could ever hear; ‘your mum has cancer’.

I was in shock. I of course went home immediately and after a long 3-hour drive, I saw my beautiful mum in the doorway, smiling and waving at me. I will never forget that beautiful smile. I don’t think I let go of her for a good few minutes.

The next few months were tough. I was back and forth university, trying to manage a breakup, work and helping my family. My younger sister Emilia was at home throughout the period and gave me regular updates. She was and definitely still is my rock and keeps me strong. My dad was incredible. He met my mum when he was 16 years old and loved her with his entire heart since then. He is my biggest inspiration. I watched him do everything he could to save his soulmate. He took her to so many doctors, stayed in hospitals, researched all treatments you can imagine. I know she knew how lucky she was to have him. And I know my sister and I have the best dad in the world.

 My mum passed away on the 8th September 2021, after months of chemotherapy. She died at home surrounded by her husband, her 2 daughters and her sister Paola. I still have nightmares about that day and the utter pain and sadness I felt is something I can never describe. The world turned darker from that moment and the fact that I can never hear her voice or her laugh is something that I grieve every day.

Grief is the most consuming and confusing thing to ever go through. I have experienced every emotion I could possibly feel. I have felt deep sadness, anxiety, numbness, anger, guilt, happiness, hate, loneliness and so many more. It is also something that never goes away. I grieve my mum every day. Some days are better than others, but not a day goes by where she is not on my mind every minute.

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 Now, you might be wondering, what does all of this have to do with Gavin & Stacey?

Gavin and Stacey 2008

Well, my parents grew up in Barry, and my mum’s family owned Marco’s Café on Barry Island, which you’ll recognize from the show. Gavin & Stacey  was always my family’s favourite show, and during her illness, mum watched it for comfort. It became a bit of a lifeline during tough times, a reminder of happy memories.

A couple of months after she passed, and after a few too many glasses of wine, dad, Emilia, me and one of mum’s best friends Donna, had a crazy idea to do a charity walk based around Gavin and Stacey to raise money for the charity Pancreatic Cancer UK.

We decided we would walk from Billericay in Essex (where the character Gavin is from) to Barry Island in Wales (where Stacey and my family grew up).

Marco's Cafe, Barry Island

And spoiler alert... we did it! In April-May 2022, we completed the walk. It was the most difficult, emotional, and rewarding experience of my life. Through every step, I felt mum with me, and I knew I was making her proud. The walk wasn’t just about raising money—it was about keeping her memory alive and raising awareness for an awful disease that needs more attention.

Crossing the finish line - 1st May 2022

This blog is going to take you through the entire journey—from the planning stages to the final steps of the walk. I’ll share the highs, the lows, the people who supported us, and the lessons we learned along the way.

My mum made me who I am today. She sacrificed a lot in her life for me and my sister, and I coun t my lucky stars everyday that I got 20 amazing years with the most amazing person I will ever know. She was not only my mum, but she was my best friend and my confidant. There is a massive void in all our lives since she has gone and I want to make this blog not only to keep her memory alive, but to draw more attention to such an amazing charity and cause and hopefully help or inspire any others suffering.

Stay tuned for more and thank you for reading!

With love,

Rhiannon